My first open mic went really well. I did not bomb! Granted it was a small venue, and the people there are really nice, so I didn't have to deal with any heckling or loud assholes in general. So this was an open mic training-wheels session.
Pros:
-Got laughs where expected
-Managed to improv pretty seamlessly into my act
-More or less maintained eye-contact with the audience
-Found appropriate voice for skit
Cons:
-Very small venue
-Would occasionally look down
-Got laughs but never gut-busting laughter
-Need to refine voice
------------------------------
What worked well:
-Everything pertaining to being dumped.
-Dirty talk jokes.
-First mom-sexy comment.
-Womp-rat bit.
-Dinner-table ex-girlfriend story.
-Facebook suggestions.
-Facebook "similar hobbies" quip.
-Facebook in the news.
-Skittle-soup
-Beginning of fat-kid sketch.
What needs to be cut:
-Facebook binge-drinking analogy. Explanation: it had their attention, but it went on too long. If I wind up making a joke about facebook comparing it to blacking out, do it as an introduction, and only for a one-liner.
-Second part of mom-sexy comments. One is enough. Or at least I need to come up with a better second example, since the first one got a lot more laughs than the second.
-As much as I want to talk about how much I hate people's updates, I need to work it into the act a different way, if at all. It takes too long to explain in order to be funny. And it's like I'm telling people what to think, which is an awful idea. So I'm cutting that.
Overall:
-Work on timing.
-Work on voice.
-Work on flow.
Otherwise it went really well. I think that I'd get to the "uproar laughter" part if I just kept the routine flowing better. From personal experience my biggest laughs don't come from a single terrific joke, they come from having multiple jokes that just keep me laughing one after the other. And eventually I'm just overwhelmed-by-funny if that makes any sense to people here?
Where I start laughing so hard I forget what I am laughing about, or when I think back to what got me started laughing like that, I can't figure out why it did. At least that is how I feel.
What do you all think about the changes?
Showing posts with label first bit. Show all posts
Showing posts with label first bit. Show all posts
Friday, July 16, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Short Set for the Week, pt.2
I'm going to be using my smartphone as a means to remind myself where to pick up if I can't remember the entire skit by tonight, so I'm going to be posting the entire thing here, updated. Just skip the parts you have already read.
-------------------------------
Opening - Being Dumped
Oh hi.
I have to be honest with you all, this is my first time doing stand-up and I'm really nervous. I'm even more nervous than the first time I ever made out with a girl. Mainly because, this time, all of you are expecting something from me, and this isn't imaginary.
In spite of that there are some startling similarities between the two situations. I'm sweating, I feel stupid, and someone is laughing at me!
Anyone here ever been dumped? Anyone? I have been dumped.
I could see it coming. She gave away subtle hints that it probably wasn't going to last.
My girlfriend called me and said that she had a dream that she cheated on me.
After she told me that her dream was to cheat on me, I thought: "You know what Ol' Matt Caron: you can still salvage this situation." So I said, in the sexiest voice I could muster through the tears: "Baby, I can make all of your wildest dreams come true."
I don't blame my ex for breaking up with me. I would ruin potentially sexy moments pretty habitually.
One time we were kissing, right. *point to audience member* Right, this guy knows what I'm talking about! Yeah! *hi5 audience member*
And she asked me to talk dirty to her. I've never been much for talking during hook ups. I would never know how to reply because I think me saying anything remotely sensual sounds ridiculous.
I'd be worried that I'd just outright mess it up by not really thinking my dirty-talk through correctly. You know she'd say something like, "Hey baby, tell me something crazy you'd do with me?" And I would just be all "oooohhh yeah: shave a goat."
I'll try anything once, though. Dating is about compromise.
So I was doing well enough, saying filthy words in a context that my mother would most-definitely disapprove of--that is how you know you're being sexy correctly. Just think "would my mother approve of what I am about to say?" If the answer is "no," then what you are about to say is sexy.
I will give you an example, audience:
"Guess what we are doing tonight babe? Eating dessert before dinner." Take that one mom; a renegade to the end.
Another example?
"Oh so you like bad boys huh? Well guess what I did earlier today? Mmmm: sent to the principal's office." Keep in mind that I am 24.
-------------------------------
Starting Bit - Relationships
I've never been too good with relationships. I got kind of a late start.
I didn't even make out with a girl until my senior year of high school. I'm like the Luke Skywalker of making out, though. By the time I was a senior I was bulls-eyeing chicks resembling womp-rats no wider than two meters. That's a little private joke between me and every other nerd in the audience.
In one of my first relationships, I was at dinner with her family, and she misspoke. Her dad said "ha-ha, I hope you don't mind, but she is illiterate." Everyone laughed. I did a faux-chuckle and said "Hah, well, lucky for her: illiteracy is a huge turn-on of mine."
I have a difficult time talking to girls because I'm awkward, and so I have to figure out other ways to impress them.
So I do that with my degree. I take it bars with me to help my chances of romantic success. It is wrapped around a baseball bat and I show it to the ladies very fast and without warning.
I call it the "cave-man method." And anyone would say that my bar-room "game" has terrific follow-through.
Plus being used as a bludgeoning tool is basically my English degree's only practical use.
-------------------------------
Body - Facebook
Facebook is what I like to call a "blackout activity." It's basically something you can work at for hours and not only accomplish absolutely nothing, but also contact all your friends without trying and then feel filthy after you stop.
It sounds weird, comparing facebook to binge-drinking, but lets put it in perspective:
When you drink, you set aside an evening to basically put all sorts of things in your body that basically make you stupid, but at the same time, make you feel smart--like everything you say is brilliant. When you go around reading people's observations and quoted song lyrics in their status updates on facebook, believe it or not: you are getting dumber, and you're going to click that "like" button.
You can't tell good from bad when you're drunk. Someone will say something that is decidedly not-profound but you'll jump all over it all like "Oh man yes that is exactly what I think all the time yes you are so smart." Especially if it is some girl that you are trying to flirt with.
Think about facebook for a second. You and all of your friends decide to "like" everything one another says, no matter how dumb it is, and ESPECIALLY if it is a cute girl. Scratch that. ESPECIALLY if it is a girl that isn't ugly.
*adlib some nonsense a Valley Girl would say--I can do it on the fly* There is always some stooge on there liking it and complimenting her crap.
Good thing facebook doesn't have a "pee on this person's property" button, but if you spend hours on there, I'm sure you'll find some group dedicated to adding one. (In my actual skit it will probably be changed to an "impregnate" button)
Facebook is invading our lives.
Everytime I log on I see some sort of suggestion. "I suggest contacting such and such," "You used to know such and such, why not friend them," "Many people 'like' this, you have this hobby in common, you'll probably like this too!"
Back off facebook; I am capable of making decisions without you! I say outloud to myself, ignoring the fact that I'm sitting on facebook in my boxers because I can't decide whether or not I want to wear pants on my day off.
I'm terrified as to how much facebook knows about me. Remember I was recently dumped? I half-expect facebook to say "Feeling pretty lonely tonight? Why not contact Ashley. She also spends a lot of time here, so she is probably single." "You haven't contacted Steph in a while, based on her status updates her self-esteem is down, now is the time!" "Sarah has gained weight, she'll probably date you now." "I suggest you stop playing Dungeons and Dragons if you ever want to kiss another woman that looks human." Gaaaahh, facebook!
-------------------------------
Closing - Young Times
Facebook made the news, recently. Some 15 year old called another 15 year old a "punk" on his facebook wall. The guy who was called a punk reacted in the only reasonable manner one can in this sort of situation: he stabbed the guy that called him a punk.
Upon further questioning, he said that he felt "belittled, insulted, and threatened." And what I really wonder: is what kind of life did this guy lead where he has never been insulted before? It is impossible to go through elementary school, middle school, and high school without being made fun of!
If I stabbed every dude who called me names and made me feel like crap throughout MY life, I'd have committed genocide. There would be a friggin' mass-grave outside of my house, and the body count would be rising to this day!
I wouldn't have a dad anymore, I'll tell you that.
He meant well, but I used to be a fat kid, and after every swim meet he would say, "hey, great races Matt. You'd have had much better times if you weighed 20lbs less." Who says that to a kid?! My dad does.
Yes, I grew up fat. It was because I ate gross things, not because I had a slow metabolism. Let me give you an example: I would melt down star bursts into a bowl and then sprinkle skittles over it and make "skittle soup," and then eat it with a spoon. I see some of you cringing. It's ok, what I am telling you is in fact pretty gross.
I, at one point, have had the "fat kid disease." No, not diabetes. I had bacon lung at one point, it was awful. It is a debilitating condition that occurs when a fat kid gets over-zealous about eating bacon, eats it too fast, and literally breathes the bacon down his wind pipe. Oh God, the price of our chubby little hubris is so high...
I never suffered from "Goose Huffs" but I've seen it. It's difficult to describe but let me paint you a picture: you and your friends have finished playing dodgeball. Everyone is panting from the exertion. Except for Sammy the fat kid, he is doing this: *perform Goose Huffs.*
And would our friends be respectful when we were fat kids? Hell no! Kids were ruthless and it was fine, because that is what we expected then.
Kids are a lot more forgiving than adults are. The crap we used to get away with doing to our friends as kids, and still keep them as friends, would never fly as adults. For example I punched my best friend in the balls when I was in 4th grade. We still talk.
If I punched my friend Jessi in the balls, SHE and I would totally not be friends anymore!
We turn eight, and for ten blissful years until we are 18, we can basically take any amount of crap from our friends and still be friends with them. Then, as "young adults" something happens: we develop self-esteem, and that just screws everything up!
As kids we don't read anything into actions, we just accept it. We didn't waste our time getting pissed about "could be"s. If I don't reply to a text from some girl, she will get all worked up making assumptions like I'm mad at her, or ignoring her, and get all indignant. You know what she'd do if we were kids? Get distracted by Nickelodeon and instantly forget. It would be AWESOME if that worked on women at my age. "Well yes I know that I forgot your birthday but hey look Ninja Turtles is on!"
Alright I think you've had enough, thanks for listening folks.
-------------------------------
-------------------------------
Opening - Being Dumped
Oh hi.
I have to be honest with you all, this is my first time doing stand-up and I'm really nervous. I'm even more nervous than the first time I ever made out with a girl. Mainly because, this time, all of you are expecting something from me, and this isn't imaginary.
In spite of that there are some startling similarities between the two situations. I'm sweating, I feel stupid, and someone is laughing at me!
Anyone here ever been dumped? Anyone? I have been dumped.
I could see it coming. She gave away subtle hints that it probably wasn't going to last.
My girlfriend called me and said that she had a dream that she cheated on me.
After she told me that her dream was to cheat on me, I thought: "You know what Ol' Matt Caron: you can still salvage this situation." So I said, in the sexiest voice I could muster through the tears: "Baby, I can make all of your wildest dreams come true."
I don't blame my ex for breaking up with me. I would ruin potentially sexy moments pretty habitually.
One time we were kissing, right. *point to audience member* Right, this guy knows what I'm talking about! Yeah! *hi5 audience member*
And she asked me to talk dirty to her. I've never been much for talking during hook ups. I would never know how to reply because I think me saying anything remotely sensual sounds ridiculous.
I'd be worried that I'd just outright mess it up by not really thinking my dirty-talk through correctly. You know she'd say something like, "Hey baby, tell me something crazy you'd do with me?" And I would just be all "oooohhh yeah: shave a goat."
I'll try anything once, though. Dating is about compromise.
So I was doing well enough, saying filthy words in a context that my mother would most-definitely disapprove of--that is how you know you're being sexy correctly. Just think "would my mother approve of what I am about to say?" If the answer is "no," then what you are about to say is sexy.
I will give you an example, audience:
"Guess what we are doing tonight babe? Eating dessert before dinner." Take that one mom; a renegade to the end.
Another example?
"Oh so you like bad boys huh? Well guess what I did earlier today? Mmmm: sent to the principal's office." Keep in mind that I am 24.
-------------------------------
Starting Bit - Relationships
I've never been too good with relationships. I got kind of a late start.
I didn't even make out with a girl until my senior year of high school. I'm like the Luke Skywalker of making out, though. By the time I was a senior I was bulls-eyeing chicks resembling womp-rats no wider than two meters. That's a little private joke between me and every other nerd in the audience.
In one of my first relationships, I was at dinner with her family, and she misspoke. Her dad said "ha-ha, I hope you don't mind, but she is illiterate." Everyone laughed. I did a faux-chuckle and said "Hah, well, lucky for her: illiteracy is a huge turn-on of mine."
I have a difficult time talking to girls because I'm awkward, and so I have to figure out other ways to impress them.
So I do that with my degree. I take it bars with me to help my chances of romantic success. It is wrapped around a baseball bat and I show it to the ladies very fast and without warning.
I call it the "cave-man method." And anyone would say that my bar-room "game" has terrific follow-through.
Plus being used as a bludgeoning tool is basically my English degree's only practical use.
-------------------------------
Body - Facebook
Facebook is what I like to call a "blackout activity." It's basically something you can work at for hours and not only accomplish absolutely nothing, but also contact all your friends without trying and then feel filthy after you stop.
It sounds weird, comparing facebook to binge-drinking, but lets put it in perspective:
When you drink, you set aside an evening to basically put all sorts of things in your body that basically make you stupid, but at the same time, make you feel smart--like everything you say is brilliant. When you go around reading people's observations and quoted song lyrics in their status updates on facebook, believe it or not: you are getting dumber, and you're going to click that "like" button.
You can't tell good from bad when you're drunk. Someone will say something that is decidedly not-profound but you'll jump all over it all like "Oh man yes that is exactly what I think all the time yes you are so smart." Especially if it is some girl that you are trying to flirt with.
Think about facebook for a second. You and all of your friends decide to "like" everything one another says, no matter how dumb it is, and ESPECIALLY if it is a cute girl. Scratch that. ESPECIALLY if it is a girl that isn't ugly.
*adlib some nonsense a Valley Girl would say--I can do it on the fly* There is always some stooge on there liking it and complimenting her crap.
Good thing facebook doesn't have a "pee on this person's property" button, but if you spend hours on there, I'm sure you'll find some group dedicated to adding one. (In my actual skit it will probably be changed to an "impregnate" button)
Facebook is invading our lives.
Everytime I log on I see some sort of suggestion. "I suggest contacting such and such," "You used to know such and such, why not friend them," "Many people 'like' this, you have this hobby in common, you'll probably like this too!"
Back off facebook; I am capable of making decisions without you! I say outloud to myself, ignoring the fact that I'm sitting on facebook in my boxers because I can't decide whether or not I want to wear pants on my day off.
I'm terrified as to how much facebook knows about me. Remember I was recently dumped? I half-expect facebook to say "Feeling pretty lonely tonight? Why not contact Ashley. She also spends a lot of time here, so she is probably single." "You haven't contacted Steph in a while, based on her status updates her self-esteem is down, now is the time!" "Sarah has gained weight, she'll probably date you now." "I suggest you stop playing Dungeons and Dragons if you ever want to kiss another woman that looks human." Gaaaahh, facebook!
-------------------------------
Closing - Young Times
Facebook made the news, recently. Some 15 year old called another 15 year old a "punk" on his facebook wall. The guy who was called a punk reacted in the only reasonable manner one can in this sort of situation: he stabbed the guy that called him a punk.
Upon further questioning, he said that he felt "belittled, insulted, and threatened." And what I really wonder: is what kind of life did this guy lead where he has never been insulted before? It is impossible to go through elementary school, middle school, and high school without being made fun of!
If I stabbed every dude who called me names and made me feel like crap throughout MY life, I'd have committed genocide. There would be a friggin' mass-grave outside of my house, and the body count would be rising to this day!
I wouldn't have a dad anymore, I'll tell you that.
He meant well, but I used to be a fat kid, and after every swim meet he would say, "hey, great races Matt. You'd have had much better times if you weighed 20lbs less." Who says that to a kid?! My dad does.
Yes, I grew up fat. It was because I ate gross things, not because I had a slow metabolism. Let me give you an example: I would melt down star bursts into a bowl and then sprinkle skittles over it and make "skittle soup," and then eat it with a spoon. I see some of you cringing. It's ok, what I am telling you is in fact pretty gross.
I, at one point, have had the "fat kid disease." No, not diabetes. I had bacon lung at one point, it was awful. It is a debilitating condition that occurs when a fat kid gets over-zealous about eating bacon, eats it too fast, and literally breathes the bacon down his wind pipe. Oh God, the price of our chubby little hubris is so high...
I never suffered from "Goose Huffs" but I've seen it. It's difficult to describe but let me paint you a picture: you and your friends have finished playing dodgeball. Everyone is panting from the exertion. Except for Sammy the fat kid, he is doing this: *perform Goose Huffs.*
And would our friends be respectful when we were fat kids? Hell no! Kids were ruthless and it was fine, because that is what we expected then.
Kids are a lot more forgiving than adults are. The crap we used to get away with doing to our friends as kids, and still keep them as friends, would never fly as adults. For example I punched my best friend in the balls when I was in 4th grade. We still talk.
If I punched my friend Jessi in the balls, SHE and I would totally not be friends anymore!
We turn eight, and for ten blissful years until we are 18, we can basically take any amount of crap from our friends and still be friends with them. Then, as "young adults" something happens: we develop self-esteem, and that just screws everything up!
As kids we don't read anything into actions, we just accept it. We didn't waste our time getting pissed about "could be"s. If I don't reply to a text from some girl, she will get all worked up making assumptions like I'm mad at her, or ignoring her, and get all indignant. You know what she'd do if we were kids? Get distracted by Nickelodeon and instantly forget. It would be AWESOME if that worked on women at my age. "Well yes I know that I forgot your birthday but hey look Ninja Turtles is on!"
Alright I think you've had enough, thanks for listening folks.
-------------------------------
Sunday, July 11, 2010
Short Set for the Week, pt1
I am doing a very small open mic this week, and I have to create a family-friendly set for it. So I'm going to use this as a means to organize that set for this week. Since I'm scrapping certain sets and adding other ones in, this can be considered a more up-to-date potential set order. As always, please give suggestions where you think things could be improved.
------------------------------------
Opening - Being Dumped
Oh hi.
I have to be honest with you all, this is my first time doing stand-up and I'm really nervous. I'm even more nervous than the first time I ever got laid. Mainly because, this time, of you are expecting something from me, and my first make-out was imaginary. (For the Coffee Co. any instances of "sex" will be replaced with "make out." Yeah it's not quite the same, but it has the same effect, and it's family safe.)
In spite of that there are some startling similarities between the two situations. I'm sweating, I feel stupid, and someone is laughing at me! (As per anonymous suggestion which I've found is much better)
Anyone here ever been dumped? Anyone? I have been dumped. (If audience doesn't reply, playfully pick on one of them, but don't be a prick. It's important to interact with the audience but not alienate any part of it negatively)
I could see it coming. She gave away subtle hints that it probably wasn't going to last.
My girlfriend sent me a text that said that she had a dream that she cheated on me.
After she told me that her dream was to cheat on me, I thought: "You know what Ol' Matt Caron: you can still salvage this situation." So I said, in the sexiest voice I could muster through the tears: "Baby, I can make all of your wildest dreams come true."
I don't blame my ex for breaking up with me. I would ruin potentially sexy moments pretty habitually.
One time we were kissing, right. *point to audience member* Right, this guy knows what I'm talking about! Yeah! *hi5 audience member*
One time we were kissing, right. *point to audience member* Right, this guy knows what I'm talking about! Yeah! *hi5 audience member*
And she asked me to talk dirty to her. I've never been much for talking during hook ups. I would never know how to reply because I think me saying anything remotely sensual sounds ridiculous.
I'll try anything once, though.
So I was doing things like saying filthy words in a context that my mother would most-definitely disapprove of--that is how you know you're being sexy correctly. Just think "would my mother approve of what I am about to say?" If the answer is "no," then what you are about to say is sexy.
So I was doing things like saying filthy words in a context that my mother would most-definitely disapprove of--that is how you know you're being sexy correctly. Just think "would my mother approve of what I am about to say?" If the answer is "no," then what you are about to say is sexy.
"Guess what we are doing tonight babe? Eating dessert before dinner." Take that one mom; a renegade to the end.
I'd constantly slip up during the dirty-talk and completely ruin the mood. It's hard to be sexy when you are inherently not-sexy: "Tell me something crazy you'd do with me." "Oh baby...rob a bank."
Starting Bit - Relationships
I've never been too good with relationships. I got kind of a late start.
I didn't even make out with a girl until my senior year of high school. I'm like the Luke Skywalker of making out, though. By the time I was a senior I was bulls-eyeing chicks that were no wider than two meters. That's a little private joke between me and every other nerd in the audience.
In one of my first relationships, I was at dinner with her family, and she misspoke. Her dad said "ha-ha, I hope you don't mind, but she is illiterate." Everyone laughed. I did a faux-chuckle and said "Hah, well, lucky for her: illiteracy is a huge turn-on of mine."
Until I got into my second year of college, I was basically invisible to women. I mean that metaphorically, in that they could see me but they just didn't notice me since I was fat and didn't have any confidence. Also I would hide behind bushes and hold my breath.
Now: I impress women with my degree. I take it bars with me to help my chances of romantic success. It is wrapped around a baseball bat and I show it to the ladies very fast and without warning. (This is actually on a dating profile that I have online, and it gets pretty positive reception so I'm going to try it out loud and see how it goes. I feel like it's misleading enough to make people chuckle).
I call it the "cave-man method." And anyone would say that my bar-room "game" has terrific follow-through. Plus being used as a bludgeoning tool is basically my English degree's only pragmatic use.
Total Time Spoken: 3mins24seconds. I could speak out certain parts quicker, and I'm going to see about cutting certain parts, but that makes sense for the start of the act.
Sunday, June 20, 2010
Great Innovators
[Potential Bit. This one is more than likely going to make it into my act. I first used it completely on the fly in an Irish Pub in Boston while my friends and I were taking a break from a video game convention. I do not know how it came up, but the premise was so amusing to me that I just ran with it.]
------------------------------------------------
+
Curve ball! That is what we call it, in the biz, where I completely misdirect my audience. Other examples of misdirection are that you probably think I'm retarded right now. Guess what? I'm not.
New innovations are completely befuddling. Who would have thought, before Thomas Edison, of using light bulbs rather than candles? The theory of relativity? That is some out-of-the-box shit if I ever did read it. The thing all of these past innovations have in common is that they have somehow benefited mankind, and advanced us as a species. So I would just accept the innovation and blissfully employ it to enhance my life, never considering for a second: "what was this person thinking that led to this innovation?" The marvel of thought behind these innovations has been beyond my grasp.
I guess what I'm building up to is: has anyone ever motor-boated some titties?
+
Curve ball! That is what we call it, in the biz, where I completely misdirect my audience. Other examples of misdirection are that you probably think I'm retarded right now. Guess what? I'm not.
I'm sure you've all heard of it, but just in case you haven't: the motor-boat is a deft sexual maneuver where, during a heated moment of passion, the guy, or guy-identified girl (lesbian) plunges head-first into those boobies and just goes like "agubububububu." Imagine me doing my best impression of a guy motor-boating some big'ol boobs. I assure you it is a spectacle.
Who thought this was a good idea? Is there some guy named Chet Snider, which by the way is the best most-stereotypical dude-brah name I could throw out there spur of the moment, anyway though: is there some guy named Chet Snider who will go down in the history books as the first innovator to think: "You know, what the hell, I'm gonna polish these tits with my face?!" I take issue with this line of thought for several reasons:
First and foremost: what in the hell, Chet?! Excuse me, ma'am *speak at a female audience member* assume that you find me attractive and we are in the bedroom doing what I like to call: "kissing a lot." You're obviously into it. Like, I'm doing the thing with the tongue where I'm like "glomp momph" and you're saying things like "oh God this is so much better than the Lifetime station," a compliment that, by the way, I never get tired of hearing when I'm kissing a girl a lot. So say I'm thinking like Chet, and I just go for it. I break from our kissing and I just dive right in there, all "agubububububu" on your boobs. Would you instantly stop the fun kissing time or would you let it awkwardly drag out for a few more minutes before having a surprise-period and asking me to leave?
That is basically the worst idea since me asking my girl friend if she wants to role play as a wizard and an apprentice. Wizard role plays are ripe with innuendo. I digress, though.
The motor-boat is not conducive to future sexual experiences, and it is certainly nothing to brag about later. Guys brag. We do. I hate to tell you women our secret, but we will often go to our friends and point out attractive women we both know and say. "Hey man, guess what I did to her?" It's not as lewd as you all think. We give multiple choice options. "Did I: a. Bone her, b. Lick her face, c. Massage her feet, or d. Shave her rampant back hair with a shard of glass?" Ok I guess it is as lewd as you think.
What kind of bragging rights does a guy who motor-boats have? "Hey guys guess what I did? I head-banged between that girl's tits and babbled nonsense while I did it!" Even all the other guys will look at him like he is nuts. Don't get me wrong, we will all think it is hilarious because, well, it is. But we would all be thinking "why on earth would a person..."
And do you know why we would think that? Because there are so many more actually awesome things that a person is in a position to do if they have the opportunity to motor-boat! The last thing I'd be thinking about if I see a pair of orb-like ta-tas is: "I wonder what it would feel like if I hit those things with my face."
------------------------------------------------
I really need to prune this skit a bit, and figure out which gags I want to keep and which I don't. This is so much better when spoken aloud. I have rehearsed it over and over, and I think that it won't really be allowed to shine until I actually interact with the audience when I do it.
It's probably the first stand up "joke" I came up with, and its the one I'm most familiar with, but at the same time I think it will be the hardest to do correctly. Because everything has to flow perfectly with the audience interaction, and if it doesn't, I'll have to improvise.
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