Thursday, July 1, 2010

Musing about traffic

It seems to me that something everyone can relate to would definitely be terrible traffic. This post is going to be observations regarding it, not necessarily jokes about it, as something I can reference to streamline my thoughts.
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Everyone you will talk to about rubbernecking insists that they hate it, yet everyone does it.

People slow down when they see the police, regardless of where the police officer is. He could be ridin a tricycle next to the road and people would think "oh shit I'm going the speed limit, I'd better start going 5 below or he'll pull me over!"

When I'm on the highway and it is backed up for miles, its usually an anti climactic accident. On 270 all of traffic was stopped for some white trash on the side of the road with their hood up. I don't mean to sound evil, but if I have to wait in traffic for 2 hours, someone better be dead.

I sometimes feel bad when I do see a massive accident, because I don't think of the tragedy, I think of how inconvenienced I am. Like aw damn, couldn't this guy have chosen to die on another day? This sucks!

I sometimes wonder if elderly people hallucinate when they drive, and that's why they drive so slow. They're watching something unfold that only they can see. (Insert ridiculous sighting here)

Or maybe they get distracted by their bodies? "Oh golly dear, I think I'm having an erection! Heh, false alarm my arm fell asleep."

3 comments:

  1. None of this is funny, sorry! It's not a slight against you, I just think people should stay away from situations that are maybe TOO universal, or jokes that anyone could think up. Don't do traffic jokes.

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  2. Saw this on a blog, laughed: "One thing that unites us as human beings is our ability to believe we are all above average drivers."

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  3. Yeeeeah I got that same vibe after I read over it again.

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